There are a lot of petty reasons I’m sure we’ve all used for when we’re not interested in someone, but the reasons Carolina gave to Dion on MAFS last night kinda took the cake.

We open with our oblivious groom Dion talking about how he wants to move on positively with Carolina, while she wanders around saying she’s bored. Dion tries to put his feelings out there with a letter (that looks like it’s about 4 pages long so probably more of an essay), while Carolina keeps talking about how they have none of the pillars of a lasting relationship in common, like watching the same TV shows, listening to the same music, and going to the gym. Seriously, I wonder if you ask those old couples who have been together happily 50 years what makes a marriage last, I bet liking the gym is top 5 for sure.

While Dion is penning his feelings, Carolina goes on a sneaky gym date with Daniel, who now says that if Dion gets hurt, it doesn’t matter cos “it’s an experiment”. From the same dude who stormed off cos Jess made a joke that their wedding wasn’t real? Just a liiiittle hypocrisy there hmmm. They laugh at Dion’s expense, making fun of the fact that he was in Carolina’s bottom 3, and I don’t know about Daniel, but if a potential love interest spent so much time trashing someone else, that would kinda be a huge glaring red flag. They just look awkward, and I don’t know if it’s the producers choosing not to give them the Jessika Power treatment but they seem to have no chemistry.

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Dion puts out a cheese board and wine, and orders the same flowers they had for their wedding. He reads the letter out to Carolina, who looks like she’s at a seminar for a time share she’s forced to sit through to get free tickets for tonight’s luau, and her voiceover talks about how she doesn’t feel anything cos he doesn’t go to the gym. The next day, Dion makes her pasta while she sits ignoring him and likely messaging Daniel.

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Dion finally brings up the fact that he’s not feeling great cos he keeps trying and she doesn’t give him anything. She says they’re mismatched cos he doesn’t eat breakfast, doesn’t like the same music and doesn’t go to the gym. He says he’s willing to compromise and she calls him delusional. He’s finally had enough and walks out on her, saying she’s sucked the life out of him.

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Sam and Al meet the parents, and it’s super awkward. Sam’s dad keeps drilling him about ambition (which does explain why Sam is so fixated on it, the same pressure was probably put on her), as if that’s the most important thing. If I were Al’s mum and he went in on my mama’s boy like that, I’m not sure if I could be as nice as Al’s mum was. She said that the most important thing is that they are happy and having fun… and it does show why Al is such a a positive, fun loving guy!

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Sam now has it in her head that Al’s ambition is not enough and is anxious about it. I kinda feel bad for her cos she looks like she’s trying to live up to that same pressure of ambition and “success”. We’ll see if she can break through from it and if Al can teach her what really matters in life!

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Matt and Kate are tasked with the photo challenge. Matt puts Kate first (before Sam and Jess) but Kate puts Matt 3rd, after Jackson and Brent. Matt is so overwhelmingly happy and excited cos he thought he was going to be towards the end of the ladder. Kate regrets her decision after seeing him so happy and moves him down to #5, and he’s still happy. Man, she’s certainly something.

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Mitch goes to get a drink with Cody to talk through his feelings of how he doesn’t want people butting into his relationship and hates the cameras and the toxic environment of the show. Which, fair enough, but also he kinda signed up for it and it’s not like it was a big secret what the show was about. Ella, to her credit, goes to talk to Dom and Tamara about Mitch’s issues an implore them to leave him alone at the dinner party or he’ll leave, which you know without a doubt Dom will do the exact opposite of.

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