Alright girls, it’s official: boobs are no longer in fashion.
No, really. Vogue said so.
In a slightly questionable op-ed in this month’s British edition of the style mag, writer Kathleen Baird-Murray pondered where the world’s collective chest had gone to; the catwalk and red carpet, she noted, was void of obvious bosoms.
“The tits will not be out for the lads,” Baird-Murray writes. “Or anyone else for that matter.”
She reckons it’s because the fash pack are sick of having their chests ogled on their internet, so they’ve started showing their shoulders, stomachs or legs instead.
Cool story, bro.
Obviously, the internet went nuts.
Vogue saying cleavage is over😂😂 boobs are no longer in trend😂😂I’ll just take them off n put them away till they r fashionable then ok X
— ® (@rachel_joyce) November 3, 2016
Same, Alice. Same.
Hey Vogue, boobs and cleavage can’t be “over”. It’s one of the few things I’ve got going about me!! Don’t do this to me guys.
— Alice 🕷 (@alicevictoria19) November 3, 2016
Boobs are a gift to everyone. Having a bad day? There’s boobs. Feeling sad? boobs… sooooo what’s up. Who decided this at Vogue?
— Ellie Gonsalves (@EllieGonsalves) November 3, 2016
You spend your whole life wishing for them, and now THIS.
Now vogue is saying cleavage isn’t cool like wtf I JUST got boobs like a year ago this is some bs.
— Coffee And Cupcakes (@C0ffeeNCupcakes) November 3, 2016
It’s been a long time coming, tbf
so glad vogue said cleavage is no longer fashionable because i have been waiting to get rid of all my old boobs in the back of the closet.
— DIAMOND (@lovethediosa) November 2, 2016
Boobs, please don’t go.
“Cleavage is over!” Vogue declares
Suddenly, billions of breasts leap off of their ‘owners’ whilst screaming in agony
— mason (@mbaeson) November 3, 2016
Save the boobs.
I will rock out with my tits out until my dying breath.
You can suffocate in the depths of my cleavage, Vogue pic.twitter.com/gHUerMln84
— Jett Rink (@jessiekaiser) November 2, 2016
If we have to get rid of the boobs, so do the boys.
*walks in on boyfriend watching “big tits” porn*
NO, HAVEN’T YOU HEARD, VOGUE SAYS CLEAVAGE IS OUT NOW
— Mariya Alexander (@MariyaAlexander) November 3, 2016
Silver linings for some, though.
Quite glad Vogue have said cleavage isn’t in fashion anymore considerin av no tits anyway
— chloe❣ (@chloerobertsxn) November 3, 2016
I’m still confused about why Vogue has stated tits are no longer fashionable, have they not seen them? They’re magnificent.
— Hannah ☕️ (@hannahxrussell) November 3, 2016
Vogue, I’m gay af. My tits were never out for the lads 🙄 pic.twitter.com/lFRwUzhylM
— ♕niamh (@dinahjauregxi) November 2, 2016
Does anyone want mine?
— bad ombres (@AlannaCoops) November 2, 2016
YOU CAN’T DENY
— Erin Fearns (@ErinFearns) November 3, 2016
According to #Vogue cleavage is dead. According to my enormous rack that’s not going to work for us 😉
— Jennie Kew 💋 (@JennieKew) November 3, 2016
No boobs = nowhere to store your cereal bowl.
Vogue declared cleavage is over. Oh well at least I still have a handy plate holder.
— Heckleberry Finn (@Kirti_Unbound) November 3, 2016
It’s just not going to work, Vogue.
vogue: cleavage is out, time to be more demure ladies
me: laughs for 80 years DEAL WITH MY CLEAVAGE
— pretty boy catcher (@tinyairports) November 3, 2016
This Vogue mag cleavage thing has my boobs totally stressed out;I keep telling them they’re great, but they just lay there. Unfashionably.
— J.Feather-Youngblood (@PalaverFlap) November 3, 2016
When do the new season boobs come in?
I’m glad Vogue has declared the cleavage over because it gives me ample time to get rid of my old boobs and get new ones from Topshop
— Holly Baxter (@h0llyb4xter) November 2, 2016
Maybe they meant to say BOOTS?
does vogue even know how boobs work
— nOW LOOK AT THIS NET (@monadozygarde52) November 2, 2016
I didnt spend 6 years with growing pains to get these boobs just for Vogue to tell me cleavage is no longer fasionable.
Can 2016 just stop.
— Lauren Moriarty (@LaurenSarah8) November 3, 2016
Viva la boob life!